The Butterfly Effect is Nothing to Feel Guilty About
by runningwyld
Summary: Coda to 7x23, "Wehe 'ana (Prelude)" AU in that Steve & Danny are in an established relationship and have recently moved in together, so Charlie's Race Car room is in the McGarrett house. Danny comes home after visiting Makino in the assisted living facility and the guilt about what happened 7 years earlier starts to get the best of him and Steve puts it into perspective for him.


Disclaimer: I own no part of Hawaii Five-0 or any of its characters. No infringement is intended.

This is the 2nd story in what I've deemed my "It's About Damn Time" universe. It follows a few weeks after my story "Did You Mean It?" but can stand alone.

The house was quiet when Danny returned home from visiting Makino at the assisted living facility. Charlie must be asleep because when both his son and his partner were awake the house was rarely quiet. Steve must be upstairs in their bedroom. Their bedroom. Sometimes, Danny still couldn't believe he and Steve now shared a room, not to mention a life. He was also amazed at how right it felt. And to think, it all started with the Ochoa cartel case and Makino. While he would always regret not taking Makino's call in time, and the fact that he hadn't protected him, Danny just couldn't regret that being taken off the Ochoa cartel case had led him to Steve and Five-0, but because he was who he was, he felt extremely guilty about that.

Danny peeked into Charlie's room and saw his son sleeping soundly in his new race car bed, a smile still on the little boy's face. He was probably dreaming about racing at Indy. Just then he felt Steve come up beside him and place an arm around his shoulders. "He loves his room," Steve whispered. "He told me, and I quote, 'Danno's the greatest.'"

Danny glanced up at Steve, "Yeah? He said that?" He still worried sometimes that Charlie would grow up to resent him for making Rachel tell him that he was his real father. He knew Charlie was too young to understand why one day Stan was "Daddy" and he was just Grace's "Danno," and then the next, everything changed. Danny was selfish though, and he refused to allow Rachel's secret to remain one. He thought he had done a pretty good job of helping Charlie adjust to his new reality, thought he was a positive influence in his son's life, he just hoped Charlie saw it that way too.

"He did. And I wholeheartedly agreed. We even fist-bumped on it." Steve grinned and moved his hand to squeeze the back of Danny's neck.

Danny looked at Charlie again before asking, "He wasn't disappointed that I wasn't here when he saw his new room?"

"He missed you because he loves you," Steve said. "But he understood. I told him you had to go visit someone in the hospital who's been very sick. He knows you love him Danny, no doubt about it. And, Charlie spending one night playing race car driver in his new room with his Uncle Steve isn't anything for you to feel guilty about. Besides, you guys live here now, so we're in this together, right? It makes me feel good that you trust me to watch Charlie by myself."

"Of course I trust you to watch Charlie, you big dope. I just hate it when any part of the time I get with him is cut short, no matter the reason, even when I know he's safe and happy spending time with you." That was certainly true. Steve loved his kids, and he absolutely relished spending time with Charlie. Danny had no misgiving about leaving the two alone. But, he missed the first three years of his son's life and he didn't want to miss anymore, even if it was just one night.

"Well, you can make up for lost time this weekend. He's already asked if he can help you make French toast waffles in the morning. Then I promised him we'd give him a paddle board lesson and he spent an hour tonight drawing plans for the sandcastle he wants to build. Plus, you better be ready to watch him take the checkered flag at least a dozen times."

"Sounds like a busy day."

"Sounds fun."

"It sounds exhausting," Danny said just to be contrary, but the fact that Steve loved spending time with his kids as much as he did was just one of the reasons he loved the man.

"Exhausting, but fun," Steve insisted.

"Okay, you win, it does sound fun. Come on, let's go to bed. With everything the two of you have planned I'm going to need my rest. Plus, I got a call from Grace. She asked if she and Will could invite a few of their friends over tomorrow afternoon to hang out on your beach. I told her it was fine."

"Our beach and of course it's fine," Steve told him. "This is her home too now. She can have her friends over anytime she wants."

Danny turned and gave Steve a quick kiss. "Let's not get carried away." Then, with one last look at the sleeping child, both men turned and went to their room. Steve, who was already in pajama pants and a t-shirt, pulled the shirt over his head and climbed into bed, while Danny headed to the bathroom. When he came out, he had stripped to his boxers and undershirt. He got into bed beside Steve and leaned back against the headboard. Steve was reading the book that had been lying on the nightstand for the last week, _Washington: A Life_ by Ron Chernow. The fact that Steve was a history buff really shouldn't have surprise him, the man went to the Naval Academy after all, but sometimes Danny forgot how intelligent Steve really was. When it came to math, science, and history, Steve was definitely smarter than the average bear. He smiled to himself; he'd been watching old Yogi Bear cartoons with Charlie on the internet. Danny reached over and turned off the lamp on his side of the bed before returning to his position propped against the headboard. He couldn't help but think about his life and how different it was from seven years ago when he first met Makino. Before he met Steve or became a part of Five-0. The more he thought about Makino the guiltier he felt.

"What are you thinking so hard about?" Steve asked. Danny glanced over and saw the book Steve had been reading lying face-down in his lap. His partner was watching him with concern.

"I was just thinking about how different my life would be if Makino hadn't disappeared seven years ago."

"What are you talking about? Wait, seven years ago? We met seven years ago."

"Exactly, when Makino disappeared, so did any chance I had of bringing down the Dario Mendez and the Ochoa cartel. Captain Tanaka pulled me off the case and reassigned me to a different one."

"What was the new case?" Steve asked, but Danny could tell he had already figured it out. He was smarter than the average bear, after all.

"The murder of a retired cop." Danny didn't take his eyes off Steve's.

"My dad's murder? You were reassigned to my dad's case after Makino disappeared?"

"That's right." Danny searched Steve's face for any sign of what he was feeling. Usually, any mention of his father's murder made Steve turn in on himself and clamp down on his emotions, but this time all he saw was understanding.

"Wow. No wonder you were so angry when you found me in the garage."

"I was angry because you were tampering with evidence at my crime scene."

"I was investigating my father's murder."

Danny sighed. "Look. Let's not have this argument again, alright?" Steve nodded his consent before rolling to his side and propping himself up on his elbow.

"So, what you're saying is that if Makino hadn't disappeared you never would have been reassigned to my dad's case and we never would have met." At Danny's shrug, Steve said, "I don't believe that."

"What, you believed we were destined to be together or something? That it was fate. That if I hadn't been reassigned and shown up here that day to find you in the garage trying to steal evidence, that we still would have met somehow, become partners, become lovers? I'm sorry. I just don't see how that's possible."

Steve looked at him like the answer was obvious and he was an idiot for not knowing it. "We're soulmates, Danny. Of course we would have met, so you can quit feeling guilty about Makino. The fact that Makino has been in a coma for the last seven years doesn't mean you don't deserve to be happy."

Danny was shaking his head before his partner even finished. "You don't understand, Steve. He called me, but I was too busy arguing with Rachel on the phone to take his call right away and by the time I did the call had been disconnected. Once I tracked him down to his motel room, he was gone. Maybe if I had hung up on Rachel like I should have and taken that call, I could have gotten to him in time, protected him."

"Danny, stop. Don't do this. This is not your fault. As you've told me too many times to count, you can't protect everybody. I refuse to let you taint what we have by treating it was if it's akin to blood diamonds or something. Sure, maybe we met because you were pulled off that case, but you did not intentionally place Makino in danger for your own selfish reasons. You waited a few extra seconds to take a phone call, that's it. Hell, you could have been in the bathroom when he called and the result would have been the same. This was not on you. You have every right to be happy. Do you think I shouldn't be happy because the only reason I met you was that my father was murdered. Should I feel guilty about that?"

"No, of course not, don't be ridic…," Danny trailed off. He closed his eyes and when he opened them, Steve was staring at him knowingly. "Okay, you're right. I'm the one being ridiculous. It's just that when I thought about where I'd be if I hadn't met you that day, it scared the shit out of me. Then I started feeling guilty because I only met you because Makino disappeared and it turns out he's been in a coma all this time. If that hadn't happened, if I'd gotten to him in time, I never would have met you, never would have become a part of Five-0, and this damn island never would have felt like home. Hell, I'd probably be living in Las Vegas, or God-knows-where, hating my life as I followed Stan and Rachel wherever they dragged my kid. So, you know me, the guilt kind of took over. But maybe instead of feeling guilty, I should just be grateful. Grateful that I did meet you, whatever the reason." Danny leaned over and kissed Steve. When he leaned back, he was smiling. "Soulmates? Really? You think we're soulmates?" Sometimes he was still amazed at the mass of contradictions that was Steve. The fact that the war-hardened, emotionally-stunted man he first met could possibly believe in something as romantic as soulmates, was just one of many contradictions he was going to enjoy spending the rest of his life discovering.

"Of course, how else do you explain a straight Jersey cop and a straight Navy SEAL meeting in Hawaii, becoming partners on a newly formed task-force, beating death too many times to count, falling in love, and deciding to spend our lives together?"

"First, I'd say that maybe that cop and that SEAL weren't quite as straight as they thought they were."

"Humph," was Steve's only response to that statement. Although the hand that had started to make its way under Danny's t-shirt was answer enough.

"Second, I don't believe in soulmates. That would mean we don't have free will. And, I'm sorry, I refuse to believe that I have absolutely no say in what happens in my life, in who I spend my life with. I like to think that we chose to be together. On the other hand, Lord knows I never would have intentionally fallen for a six-foot Neanderthal, so maybe having you as my soulmate is just one big cosmic joke, because let me tell you, Babe, you are a hell of a lot of work."

"You love me." Steve's hand came to a rest over Danny's heart.

"God help me, I do." He reached up and pulled Steve closer, but before their lips met Steve leaned back and looked him in the eyes.

"I love you too. Maybe you're right about there being no such things as soulmates, but whatever the reason we met, I'm really glad we did. Even though I never would have intentionally chosen to fall in love with a loud, opinionated, doom-and-gloom Haole like you, but soulmate or not, you're it for me."

"You sweet-talker you." Danny again tried to pull Steve down for a kiss, but the man was being stubborn. While Steve being stubborn was not an unusual occurrence, it usually didn't happen when Danny was trying to kiss him.

"Are you sure you're not going to feel guilty anymore for being happy ?" Steve asked.

"I'm sure. But, I am going to watch out for Makino this time. I think I owe him that much. Besides, when he comes out of the coma, I've got to tell him thank you."

Steve nodded. "I'll go with you. I've got a lot to thank him for too." After that, Danny had no more trouble kissing Steve. He did have trouble stopping though, but who needed a full-night's sleep anyway?

 _Fin_.


End file.
